Friday, February 7, 2014

"Reagan, Get your things ready 'cause we're going to the V-E-T. Don't tell ollie."

The vet. The worst words a cat could hear. Today we went there. Ollie was FREAKING out. He was screaming in the car. And when he got his shots, he was probably cussing. This is what he probably was saying:
"Don't push me in that carrier. Oh, DON'T PUSH ME IN THAT CARRIER I SAID! Don't zip me up! Yikes! Why am I being lifted to the car?! STEPS! Oh, STEPS! Please don't put me in the car, oh please don't. What did I ever do to you? I Like this house. I Think I'll stay here. Oh no, not the gas and the steering wheal combination! Run! Why am I yelling run, I am in a closed in carrier. I can't run. Silly me. I'm safe here. Don't panic, Oliver. WHO am I kidding?! I'm Gonna DIE! DIE I said! I will DIE in here! Oh, I recognize this place. Its the vet. No worries, I've been here before. Wait, did I just say the vet?! VETTTT! VETTT! VETTTTTT! VETTTTT! There are dogs in here. Please don't make me go. Oh please. Why are they checking my wait? Are they trying to make me feel bad about myself after I went on my diet? Well, What is that round thing in your hand human? What do you think you are DOING? IT'S A PILL!  Gulp. You just shoved that thing down my mouth you do realize. And it did
NOT taste delightful. Is that pointy thingie for me? Why are you aiming that cat-killer sharp dinglehopper at me? YOOOUCH! That hurt! EEEK! My paws are killing me! Your making me cry. I Think all be going now. WHY ON EARTH ARE YOU PICKING ME UP?!!! WHY ON EARTH ARE YOU SHOVING ME INTO THIS CARRIER! PUT ME DOWN BEFORE I PUMP YOUR GUTS FULL OF TREATS!"
Oliver lost it.

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